Have I told you recently that I love you?
Oh, I haven’t. Well, that’s a shame. I’ll put it on my to do list, right under this one that says, “Get some more cough drops.” I guess I’ve been too busy magnetically attracting all of these stylish and refined French people!
I often hear people say, “You are a French Magnet.” I often hear this because I often tell myself this while looking in the mirror each morning applying my facial wax hair remover. It brings me confidence to say this to myself and frankly, c’est vrai!
Last night, one of mon nouveaux amis et I were at a very cool party. We knew it was very cool because we were dressed up in costumes, there were tea lights lit on all the tables and we were drinking red wine out of mason jars in a lovely, white tent. Since I am very French, I brought a scarf. You see, I had dressed up as a Matador and used the pink scarf as the red cape that I would theoretically use to fight a bull. If there had been any bulls invited, I would have fought them There were not any bulls, but there was one shark. However, I am not a shark fighter. Additionally, I also thought I’d bring the scarf because I was going to with my chic French friend (she has lived in Paris!) and I wanted to use it if I needed warmth and style later.
Let me take this time to introduce you to a French word I hardly ever use because I hardly ever need to: faux pas.
I am sure you are familiar with this definition, so I will not waste time explaining it, but rather tell you an interesting small diversion story that humbly brags about how well I know wine. I write to vineyards and they write back. Let’s just leave it at that.
Anyway, I experienced a small faux pas last night when I placed my scarf on the table. Then about six people asked me if I could be in their photo, which obviously happens all the time, costume or not, so I of course, agreed. Then, I strangely started to smell a rather pungent burning smell. My chic French friend and I quickly realized that my scarf had caught fire from one of the tea lights. Oh mon dieu!
I quickly extinguished it with my bare hands and then told my friends that I had many scarves at home. This was to take the time, where I almost burnt down the entire party, to prove how French I really am. I don’t just own one scarf. Pff! No! I own six.
And, of course, it isn’t. Now, I must run out and get those cough drops.