A long time ago, I was at a party discussing underwear. There was a hobo trashcan fire burning in the… Read more French Underwear
“Dear Coworkers from my first job after college, I will never forgive you. That’s right, jerks. You threw out my… Read more C’est ma vache.
Oh hi! I love your costume. That wig looks so real! And, your makeup is also spot on 1981. Is… Read more Hallo, Ween.
The above image is how I feel today. You see, Debbie, (that’s what your name is, right? that’s what it… Read more C’est mauvais! (not really).
Oh mon dieu. There’s someone in the kitchen. I hear them. They are clanking a cup. I just heard… Read more Brian est dans le cuisine.
Oh okay, so my dream aspiration is to become this famous writer, so famous that when I go to give… Read more Fish Sticks and Death Jokes
Howdy mon amie. Your cowboy coffee sure does look pretty dern good. I like how the grounds stick to your… Read more Je suis Americaine.
What a distinctive laugh you have. Wow. It’s quite high, isn’t it? Like it goes really high there at… Read more I promise to find ribs.
What is this? Is this old underwear? Oh mon dieu. No, no. This won’t work. You see, I will… Read more I will only wear new underwear.
When I’m in other countries, I often try not to speak and just hope everyone assumes that my nationality is… Read more Pura Frencha.